Warning - This post is real and raw.
NICU life is hard. I was researching resources for NICU families and actually read that NICU Mom's can get PTSD from their experiences at the hospital. I thought reading about other's experiences would help to put mine in perspective; but it doesn't/hasn't. My situation is my situation and comparing it to other situations doesn't change a thing. This is a similar line of thought as to why I have mostly quit social media.
Currently, I get to see Frankie a few hours per day. I pump every 3-4 hours to keep milk going for him; I actually pump, pause, change bottles, and pump some more so the hospital can feed him the more nutritious hind milk. I work as I can and spend quality time with Thean, Livia, Max, and my Mom.
The positive: Frankie is doing as well as can be expected. He broke 3 pounds today weighing in at 1370 grams.
The raw - I feel out of sorts myself. My work is graciously allowing me to work from home but I have to be driven by Thean or my Mom every day to the hospital. I have a doctor appointment tomorrow where I hopefully will be cleared to drive. My next recovery milestone will be being able to pick up my toddlers and swim!
More raw - I am exhausted... yet I feel like I need to do more. It still doesn't feel real. Did I really need to pop out an extreme preemie to show how strong I am?
The real - Is it weird that through all this the consistent questions I have are: How do I provide more value so I can make more money to better support my family? How do I help my businesses thrive so I don't have to worry about the financial side of this mess? Comments below appreciated.
I am doing my best to be present every moment with Livia, Max, and Frankie. 18 days into this NICU journey and I may already be losing my mind. But who wouldn't lose their mind given our situation. The truth is we don't even know when we will get to bring Frankie home and that is hard to digest in itself.
Here are some articles I read while looking up NICU resources and am still deciding if they are helpful or not:
Bonus - Here is my favorite most recent picture of Frankie:
Science, Solutions, and Sprinkles (SSSprinkles.com) is the personal branding site for Sara Jane Weidner (now Bellocchi). It is the confluence of all her businesses, thoughts, knowledge, and a way to give back... through distilling information into an interesting and entertaining content pillar.